One for the Gipper

Emus do it… so do whales and coyotes.  Heck, the fabled Hoolook Gibbons of Bangladesh insist on doing “it”.  Even when humans put forth the infamous ‘ole college try, “it” doesn’t always have the same results.  But if you are lucky enough for the planets to align just the way they should, and you, as a valued partner in a relationship are able to find that you can mate for life, pop open the cork and celebrate your good fortune.

In a perfect world it seems it should be easy to locate and coexist with just about anyone that you would like.  On the outside most folk look to have about the same general issue equipment… arms, legs, fingers, toes, a head, etc.  Even if all the external gear isn’t in proper working order, it’s when you get inside the head that can make all the difference.  When the fireworks go off and the chemistry of the mental connection is made, you feel that you can leap tall buildings in a single bound.  I highly suggest that you go with this kind of relationship as opposed to basing your selection of mates solely on looks – good looks tend to fade and then what are you left with?

Age and experience play a factor, too.  If you look back and see the evolution of your love life, it can be a little scary.  There was a boy in second grade that I loved and knew that we were meant to be together… based solely on the fact he didn’t run away when I threw up in class (actually, now that I think about it, this single life altering event could have been reason he became a medical doctor) when everyone else did. I knew I had really matured when, in high school, I dated a guy on the football team because his jersey number was the same as my dad’s was when he was an All-State lineman… this relationship didn’t last past the season.

Practice makes perfect.  Well, at best you hope you learn something as you stumble through the highly defined and self-imposed dating dos and don’ts.  You try not to make the same mistakes twice and pray that you get out of the rut of choosing the same type of person those with big time needs that you think that the only way they can be saved is to be with you.  Find out if you can laugh with this person.  Know you are being honest to yourself and who you really are when you spend time with an individual.  Feel that compromise is a two way street and that you both win (and lose) at times.  I never went with the “we’re best friends” theory.  It has to be more than that, besides, you probably have enough friends and what you need here is honesty, trust and a love that transcends time.

Since no one ever teaches you how to really be in a long-term relationship, I have noted, through experience, there will be a lot of trial and error; much laughter and crying; rollercoaster ups and downs.  Persevere, even a bit more than you think you can at the time.  Pick your fights and know when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em.  After 15 (at times long but always interesting) years with my snookums, my Adonis of love, the honey-bunny that endures, I think I may have mated for life.  Happy Anniversary, my love muffin… and many, many more.

Cynthia A. McClelland, curious observer of the obvious with interpretations of the oddities of daily life.  Mother, wife and lover of the furry, resides in the north Lake Tahoe area.                      

Cynthia A. McClelland © 2003-