Changes in Attitude, Changes in Latitude

Have you ever noticed that there is a huge difference in attitude and speed of action on your part when you want to do something versus when you have to or are forced to do something?  The older I get the more my radar is kicking in and the differentiation and disparity between the two is becoming much wider.  I am amazed at the level of procrastination that sets in when an unenviable task presents itself compared to when an event or opportunity of fun and frolic is offered.

I used to approach each undertaking in my life with great enthusiasm, thinking that each occasion had benefit, even when it was hidden and unknown to me.  I was willing to take a risk on the outside chance that I would learn something fresh and new, experience new heights or engage in a casual nexus of meaningful and purposeful events.  I must have peaked with this level of eagerness around the age of 40, because it sure seems to have gone down hill since then.

I can put off for days things that appear and are justified in my mind to be exercises in futility.  I can reshuffle my daily routine to postpone the obvious.  And, I can put off making major decisions until I feel like I want to put my brain in a position of ponderance… um, I mean I have appropriately accumulated and analyzed the facts and figures to reinforce the concluded assessment and resolution that upholds the fitting solution for the issue in question.

On the other hand, “wanting” to do something facilitates a different demeanor and disposition on your part.  Think of it this way, you decide to take a routine (in my mind, required) and strategically-timed “mental health” day of refreshing your psyche and rejuvenating your soul, nesting at home, reading trashy magazines, watching Oprah, the Food Network and HGTV (all undisturbed while eating lunch right in front of the TV), not lifting one finger to dust or vacuum and not getting out of your pajamas until you want to.  This is distinctly different compared to having to stay home because you are sick or have to wait for a serviceman to show from the proverbial “we’ll be there somewhere between 9-2”.  I have found how you identify the day will affect your overall feeling of accomplishment and achievement for the day, or not.

It is all in how you look at things and the choices you make.  I can’t compare lack of passion or desire as anything close to being lazy.  One person’s chore and drudgery can be another person’s entertainment and recreation.  There are times when being a sofa spud has its benefits (with your family, snuggled on a chilly fall night discussing the reasons why Jerry Springer had lasted this long or what will happen on Wisteria Lane) and times when decisive and assertive actions are pertinent (for some reason the government likes to have your taxes paid regularly).

It’s true, my priorities have changed, but that doesn’t make a person bad.  Since I feel I am a little wiser than I was I do weigh which choices I make - life is too short to fret, worry about what could have been or regret a decision made 20 years ago.  As long as there are no underlying motives, people being unduly criticized or hurt and I feel like there is some good associated with my selection of wants and haves, life (as I face it) cannot be all bad.

Sometimes it is good to have a change in attitude, a change in latitude.  Go for it and enjoy.

Cynthia A. McClelland, curious observer of the obvious with interpretations of the oddities of daily life.  Mother, wife and lover of the furry, resides in the north Lake Tahoe area.

Cynthia A. McClelland © 2003-