Mind Your P's and Q's

Good manners go a long way.  There, I said it and I mean it.  Somewhere between your mother telling you to “mind your manners” and now, civil behavior seems to have been lost on the masses.  I am not sure when this phenomenon began or why, but if we don’t turn it around soon we might as well grab our loincloths and hunker down in some nice cave someplace.

Personal decorum has been replaced by rude, crude and socially unacceptable displays of public conduct.  Heck, people can’t even muster a smile for the smallest attempt at courtesy.  And that is implying that there are those who still are willing to open a door, give a hand when needed, or let another car turn in front of them without fear of being accused of everything but the right reason for which the gesture was intended.

Have we become a society of entitled spoiled brats?  It seems so.  We take what we want and darn it, it better be when we want it, in the appropriate color, quantity and quality… or we are going to be one angry self-indulged horror of a creature who is going to show the world what it has coming… without nary a second thought or a puny thank you.

Don’t get me started on what I think of the people who think talking with their mouths full (and hey, while your are at it – take those elbows off the table!) is better than waiting a few seconds to put their two cents into the conversation.  Common courtesies (along with common sense) have all but vanished from everyday life.  If you do happen to run into a “please and thank-you” person, they catch you off guard and you almost have to wonder what they are up to and why they are sucking up.

Folks fall speechless if another human takes the time to open a door for them when their hands are full.  Men pulling chairs out for women seems to have faded into the sunset and long gone are the days when it was second nature to say “excuse me” when you pass in front of someone.  We have become bulldozers, pushing and shoving our way to what we think we deserve when what the world needs now is a gentle, kinder, throw-back feel that brings people together instead of pushing us further apart.

In our world, as collections of individuals from all walks of life, we have forsaken Emily Post and all she stood for.  If we remember what she so boldly stated in 1922: “Manners are made up of trivialities of deportment which can be easily learned if one does not happen to know them; manner is personality – the outward manifestation of one’s innate character and attitude toward life” – there still could be hope for most of us.  Not that we have to be knowledgeable about the finer points of eating asparagus, but gaining a few pointers of protocol may come in handy and something we can model for others.

I wish to thank each of you for your unremitting consideration to my written word and bid you adieu with the wise words of Mrs. Post… “If children see temper uncontrolled, hear gossip, uncharitableness and suspicion of neighbors, witness arrogant sharp-dealing or lax honor, their own characters can scarcely escape perversion.  In the same way, others cannot easily fail to be thoroughbred who have never seen or heard their parents do or say an ignoble thing.”

Cynthia A. McClelland, curious observer of the obvious with interpretations of the oddities of daily life.  Mother, wife and lover of the furry, resides in the north Lake Tahoe area.

Cynthia A. McClelland © 2003-